Help Your Child Finish the School Year on a Strong Note
Photo © Carrie Craft, licensed to About.com, Inc.
As we're finishing up school here this week, and man did time fly, it's easy to want to just coast in to a summer of relaxation. But, while it may be the end of the school year, it's still important as a foster parent to help your foster child finish the year strong.
- Encourage your foster child to participate in fun end-of-the-year activities. Perhaps go as a volunteer.
- Attend book fairs and buy several books to encourage reading during the summer. Ask their teacher for recommendations or appropriate reading levels.
- Encourage your children to finish homework and get in any extra credit points, if possible.
- Collect last papers, pictures, and report cards for the social workers and birth mom and dad.
Is school almost out in your area? Are your kids excited for summer or going to miss friends. I have a mix here, one is excited, and the other is sad.
Foster Focus Magazine and Chris Chmielewski
Photo courtesy of Chris Chmielewski
Two years ago we learned about the launch of a new magazine for foster parents and others who work within the foster care system. That magazine, Foster Focus, launched May 2, 2011, in honor of National Foster Care Awareness Month, has covered amazing stories and participated in many events under the leadership of its owner and creator, Chris Chmielewski. Chris Chmielewski is a former foster kid who aged out of the system to become a success story. He is very passionate about the needs of foster children and the need to improve the foster care system that cares for children.
From Chris:
"Success for me has been measured in how seriously I have been taken by the hierarchy of the system. People really seem to enjoy the fact that the mag is run by a former foster kid, especially the CEO's. I think it makes them feel like they had a hand in the success story. Also getting to meet Jimmy Graham from the Saints is pretty cool too."
Photo courtesy of Chris Chmielewski
Learn more about Foster Focus magazine and Chris Chmielewski. Foster Focus is the first nationally distributed monthly magazine devoted to foster children.
Happy Mother's Day
Getty Images / Mario Lalich
I have to agree with the popular saying, "Motherhood is not for wimps." I think it goes double for foster and adoptive mothers. It takes a special person to mother and nurture a child that is not your biological child.
Click "comments" below and share something special about your mom, whether she's your birth, adoptive, or foster mom. We would love to hear your comments.
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What Is an Adoptive Mother?
Adoption Stories - When We Became a Forever Family
You Know You're a Foster or Adoptive Mother When...
Adoption Poems for Adoptive Parents
Foster Care and Foster Care Adoption Poems
Today Is BirthMother's Day
It may not be well known to the rest of the world, but so some in the adoption community - today, the Saturday before Mother's Day, is Birthmother's Day. Here is a link to some poetry and other writings by birth or first mom's.
Most adoptions are a happy time for the adoptive family. Adoption is seemingly all about the adoptive parents and the child and what they have gained. Little thought is often given to the losses created by adoption.
By reading the words of these birth mothers I hope that we can begin to see and appreciate their feelings. Take some time this weekend to think about the women who have made us adoptive mothers mothers and what we or our children can do to honor and remember them.
Suggested Reading:
Mother's Day Is Coming!
Photo © Carrie Craft, licensed to About.com, Inc.
There are many people who don't understand what it means to parent another person's child. The comments that I receive run from, "you're such a saint" to "you're so crazy." I personally hate these types of comments. Most days I feel like I fall short of one of the above descriptors and fully live up to the other.
Those of us experienced with fostering know that reality lies somewhere in the middle. It takes a special person to be a foster or adoptive mother, but it also takes a bit of the crazies too. Moms in general are talented and deserve their special day, but there is something extra special in my opinion, about an adoptive or foster mom.
Click "comments" below and share something special about your mom, whether she's your birth, adoptive, or foster mom. We would love to hear your comments.
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Suggested Reading:
- What Is an Adoptive Mother
- 14 Ways for a Birth Mother or Birth Father to Honor & Remember a Placed Child
- Birthmother's Day Created Out of Love or Just More Adoption Propaganda?
- Birth Mother's Day or Mother's Day?
Quick, find a gift for mom:
May Is National Foster Care Awareness Month
This month, all over the country, different foster care agencies celebrate and honor foster parents, but there is a larger goal: to motivate more Americans to step up and help the over 400,000 children in foster care.
There is always a need for more foster parents, especially since many foster parents adopt the children placed in their home if they are unable to return to birth parents. This means agencies are losing beds in which to place future foster children.
If you have ever considered fostering, May is the perfect month to check it out. See what advice those who are already fostering want those considering foster parenting to know? Don't want to give advice? Share your feelings - What does foster parenting mean to you?
If you are already a foster parent, check out this ecourse on how to be a Great Foster Parent.
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Related Reading:
All About Foster Care Awareness Month
The History of National Foster Care Month
Daily Activities to Celebrate National Foster Care Month
Foster Care 101
New Articles for April 2013
This month I focused on adoption search angels and adoption searches.
Suggested Reading/New Articles and Features:
The Adoptive Family and Adoption Reunions
It's not easy being the adoptive parents during an adoption reunion. I think it's especially true when it's a foster care adoption and you as the foster adoptive parent know about the abuse and neglect that occurred in the birth home.
I'm thinking about adoption reunions again as I've recently learned that one of my sons wants to see his birth grandfather who is dying. I understand this need to see his grandpa before he dies, but I also feel a bit nervous as I know the drama and games other members of his birth family like to play.
So, I'll ask the question again - where is our [adoptive parents] place in an adoption reunion?
Should adoptive parents have any part in an adoption reunion?
Some say that the adoptive family's expectations don't matter when it comes to birth parent reunions. I believe that it all rests on the adoptee and what he/she wishes to happen. Now that my sons are grown men - I don't feel that I have a place in their reunions. They share with me what's going on in their birth family's lives, but that's about it, and I'm okay with that.
What do you think? Click "comments" below and share your thoughts on this blog.
Is it Time to Change Your Foster Care Agency or Adoption Agency?
I noticed on a past blog comment a reader asked the following:
"My husband and I have been foster parents for one and half year. We are waiting for a fost to adopt, but the four kids we fostered have all returned to birth parents. We are with a foster family agency, but I wonder how long are we going to have to wait. We are not picky as we do want an older child boy or girl age 8-11 years old. I have heard there is a big need for adoptive parents for an older child. This does not seem to be the case with us. I wonder if we should change our agency since our agency is only foster and don't specialize with adoptions. Does that make a difference. Please we need some suggestions from people."
I felt the same way when we first became foster parents, heard there was a huge need, but then stood empty for a year. If hadn't been working in a children's home and saw the need first hand, we would have probably quit. Yes. There is a need, so don't quit yet. Fostering to adopt is often a long wait. It's also a difficult journey for those who take on the challenge as it requires that the foster parent be pro-family reunification, but then also choose to adopt the child if the family does not complete the reunification plan. Sounds like this particular foster family has done an awesome job maintaining boundaries and helping a family reunite.
I think it does make a difference if you're not with an foster agency that specializes in adoptions. What we have done in the past is work with our foster care agency for foster placements, but then we also submitted our adoption home study with another agency that specializes in adoptions and foster care.
It's a difficult question to answer when each State handles adoptions and foster care differently, but it may be worth asking your social worker for an opinion on the matter. It doesn't hurt for more than one agency to be looking for a child that fits in with your family.
What advice would you offer this reader? Should she switch foster care agencies? Ask more questions? Or give it more time?
Suggested Reading:
10 Things that Will Help You Become a Foster Parent in the Future
Preparing to be a foster parent means more than having the right gear.
Photo © Carrie Craft, licensed to About.com, Inc.
May is almost here, which means National Foster Care Awareness Month is almost here. The purpose of the month long celebration is to the public to be aware of the need for more foster parents.
It is not uncommon for families, during the required training for foster parents, to decide that it's not the right time to foster, or adopt. Other people just want to know how they can better prepare to be foster parents at a later date.
No matter the motivation for joining a foster parent training class, most prospective foster parents can't help but think of all the stuff they will need as foster parents - stuff like beds, bedding, strollers, toys, and clothes. The list goes on. But, there is so much more involved to being prepared to foster than just the gear.
If you think foster parenting sounds like something you'd like to do, but want to know how to get ready for such a journey, then check out this article that was prompted by an email from a 19-year-old who is definitely planning for her future. A future that she hoped included foster children.
Suggested Reading: