Need a Parenting Out? Head to Nebraska! What?
Well, it keeps getting better and better in Nebraska with their newly enacted safe haven law. With the law's wording of "child" and not infant, Nebraska parents are taking note and abandoning pre-teens and teens now at area hospitals without fear of prosecution for abandonment.
The word must be traveling because Nebraska has started to turn into a teen hot spot, and it's not for the dance music. It's for parents, and even grandparents, from out of state to drop off their troubled teens. Yes, Nebraska stated in the law that anyone can drop off a child in Nebraska. Kids, if grandma (or aunt, uncle, neighbor, or cousin Joe want to go on a long car ride, be suspicious. One frazzled Michigan mom drove nearly 12 hours to drop off her 13-year-old son. 12 hours on the road with any child may be enough to want to throw in the towel.
As parents most of us have had those days when we wonder, "What was I thinking? I chose to have these little people running around my house, on purpose." But we shake it off and all is right in the world when we get a Popsicle kiss or a dandelion bouquet.
However, as the kids grow, the kisses slow and the bouquets are long forgotten. We get the opportunity to parent struggling mini adults that throw two-year-old type tantrums. As adults we know nothing, the kids think they know everything and everything equals drama. Lots of drama.
However, abandoning your child is not OK. It may seem like it at the time, but it's not. Nebraska officials are very concerned about this trend and want struggling parents to know that this is not the answer. Seek help through resources in your area first and know that if you choose to drive to Nebraska, you may not be allowed to get your kids back, even if you change your mind.
This is not the intent of the law. The law was for children in immediate danger, especially infants.
What do you think of Nebraska's new law?
Thoughts on parents driving out of state to drop off troubled teens?
Click "comments" below and share or join us in the forum where we are discussing this topic.
2nd out-of-state teen dropped at Omaha hospital - seattlepi.com
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You can knock Nebraska all you want but maybe someone needs to realize that there really isn’t a lot of agencies to help these parents out. I currently live in Nebraska and instead of small town Christian families turning to help others they shun you. I have lived here my entire life and I see how the church going families don’t turn to help people. I read you biography and it says that you have experience in this field and I do as well. Maybe it is time for legislatures and people like you in this field to realize that people are struggling and it is time we step up and help.
I hope you come back and read this. It’s not about “knocking” Nebraska – I’m saying the law wasn’t written very well….they weren’t expecting the number of people who need help with their older children to utilize the safe haven.
There is a HUGE need. When we’ve needed help – we’ve been judged. I totally understand these people. I know people are struggling – we’re among those people. As for getting help? The resources are lacking or cost more than our home.
As for what’s needed? More than what’s available.
Bottom line is that this is a poorly written law but it does draw attention to deficiencies that exist for parents who need assistance.
I’m sure the law will be revised soon and I hope that parents of children above the age will consider other adoptions, including open adoption, before abandoning their children.
I think is a great situation for several reasons.
1. Removal of children from parents who don’t really want them leaves children’s future brighter because they can go to a family who really wants children.
2. This “problem” illustrates very cleanly to our modern society what happens when you allow schools to teach students they don’t really need to listen to their parents, or abide by parental rules, and rewards the kids for reporting corporal punishment as child abuse. When you rip away the ability for parents to PARENT, this is the end result! So, America, this is your mirror!
“America, this is your mirror!”
Yes, it is. And what a sad reflection we see, when this is the angle we look at. Just a couple thoughts to keep it brief:
1. I am so thankful that Nebraska passed this law. It wasn’t “poorly worded”– I see the lack of specificity regarding age as a blessing in disguise. Back to the “mirror” metaphor: it’s like being given a hand mirror to augment your normal bathroom mirror’s view, and discovering an ugly abscess behind your ear. You would never have noticed it without this Nebraska mirror bringing it to light. Nebraska can close the loophole, if they want to or need to: it has already shown us that there are parents so desperate that, if possible, they really would drop off their tweens or teens never to be responsible for them again. Possibly never to see them again. Parental pain and helplessness and frustration is indeed that bad.
2. Let’s not overgeneralize. There has been no thousand-mom rush to Nebraska, no squatter camps of de-parented teens behind the state capitol building. Yes, this has brought to light a desperation I would not have believed otherwise: some parents are in dead earnest when they say “If I could abandon this kid in a cornfield somewhere, I would.” Legal consequences might honestly be the ONLY thing preventing them. I’ll take “hyperbole” more seriously from now on, in counseling sessions. BUT: it doesn’t characterize the entire face of American parenting. Remember the beauty and selfless love and creativity and character that also abound.
For every teen abandoned in Nebraska there are a thousand Eagle Scouts or prom queens or regular high school graduates who take the mic with tears in their eyes and say “Thanks mom, dad, for sticking with me and supporting me all this way.”
fzldlvqljabmqgkawell, hi admin adn people nice forum indeed. how’s life? hope it’s introduce branch