The Challenges of Foster Care
Over a month ago I received an email from someone interested in becoming a foster parent. What I love most about getting email is that it gives me the opportunity to learn what I'm doing well, and what I'm falling down on.
Hi Carrie,
You're articles have a lot of information about foster care, but I do have some questions.
what I'm looking for is an article that tells you really like it is, the challenges, difficulties, etc. I'm interested in foster care, but I'm not sure if it's for me and I wanted a "from the trenches" report. The state agency says it's challenging, but what exactly does that mean? I've gleaned from your articles that it can be stressful, but just how stressful? what can you expect from these kids? Is it an ongoing battle to manage their behaviors?
I've volunteered with kids for years at after school programs and most of them are very sweet and adorable. Many of the kids have become close to me and they are really wonderful and fun to be around. I also have a niece and nephew (now grown) that spent a lot of time with me when they were little. It's these experiences that have prompted my interest in foster care. But do my experiences with kids match the reality of foster care? Anyway if you have any articles dealing with this subject, I'd love to read them.
This email pointed me in the direction of some missing information. So, I wrote up a quick count down of challenges faced by foster parents.
All foster parents out there, what would you add to the list? What advice would you give this potential foster parent? Click "comments" below and share.
I would have to say that to me, the biggest challenge of fostering is parenting by committee. Decisions that you would make on your own about where to go, what to do and how to parent must include the foster worker and others involved as the child is considered a ward of the state.
Don’t get me wrong- I understand the need for safety, accountability, etc- but it does make it hard when you need permission for things like- haircuts, field trips, family trips.
The pediatrician at our foster clinic does not believe in feeding cereal to children under 4 months old. We suffered through more hungry baby nights than I would have! But had I fed the child earlier- against physician orders- the babies could have been taken away from us.
I hear ya! That is very frustrating.
I was also thinking about the foster child’s behaviors or issues on the other children in your home.