Many birth parents do not know how to participate in a parent teacher meeting. Birth parents joining foster parents at a school conference is one way foster parents can mentor birth parents and help them be more involved in their child's education.
This may seem intimidating to some foster parents, so I asked my friend, who is a very experienced foster parent for some tips. Here is what she shared about being a role model to birth parents at a parent teacher meeting.
Hopefully foster parents have provided birth parents with regular updates on the child's progress at school before the conference. Grade cards, completed homework, tests etc.
Schedule the conference with the birth parents schedule in mind. Remember, birth parents have a lot they have to accomplish. This includes maintaining employment, parenting classes, therapy and various other appointments.
Let the teacher know that the birth parent will be attending the parent teacher meeting and assure them that it is OK. Some teachers may find it a bit intimidating to be working with two sets of parents. They may wonder who to direct questions to. Your positive attitude will help put them at ease.
Greet the birth parent and introduce them to the teacher.
Allow the birth parent to participate with the child. Allow the child to show the parent around the class etc.
Do not get caught up with statements the birth parent may make such as, "This was not an issue when he was with me" or "He was doing fine until he was removed from the home." Do not argue these points.
Allow them to offer advice and talk with the child if there are behavior concerns etc. Be ready to assist, if needed.
Ask questions, remain calm, and remember that you are role modeling. This is a learning experience for the birth parent.
Allow the opportunity for the birth parent to assist with the child's education. If the teacher suggests that the child needs to work on some skills like multiplication facts, ask the birth parent if she would like to help with that during her time with the child. Provide materials at their next visit and ask how it went. Thank them for advice when they offer what worked or did not work.
This is usually the birth parent's only contact with the school. You can follow up with the teacher later if you still have questions or concerns.
