Open Adoptions Bring Possible Boundary Issues
Some birth families may struggle with knowing how they fit into the big picture in an open adoption. Adoptive families may struggle with knowing how to incorporate two sets of parents. While one set parents actively, the other set brought about life and a sense of stability and roots.Communicate up front what the boundaries are in regards to visitation, phone calls, and birth parent input in the raising of the child.
Remember that everything can be renegotiated as time goes on.
Open Adoptions Bring Possible Unrealistic Expectations
Unmet expectations can be an issue on both sides of an open adoption. A birth parent may expect perfection from an adoptive parent, while an adoptive parent may expect the birth parent to play a quieter role in their child's life.This is why it's important to establish expectations at the very beginning of the relationship. This is for life. While roles and expectations may change, your child's need for all of you in his life, will not.
Open Adoptions May Mean Associating with Those One Would Normally Not Associate
It may sound ugly, but it is a factor. We all have our own morals and values, and not everyone agrees. Don't we choose our friends based on many different factors? What if birth parents and adoptive parents just don't mesh well?Think about what is best for the child over your own needs and comfort first.
If it's a matter of safety, such as drug use, then limit contact to letters or emails, but explain that change to the other party and to the adoptee.
Consider This:
Notice how the cons seems to be about the communication and social issues between adoptive and birth parents. Keep this in mind while you visit the list of Pros of an Open Adoption.
